Point A

I have been really dying to write a blog for about a year now.  It sounds ridiculous I'm sure, because writing a blog is far from difficult and everyone and their Grandma has one already.  The problem is I over think everything.  Instead of just diving into the project I kept trying to grasp what the essence of the blog should be, which really became an issue of personal identity.

Who am I?

That is not what this blog is going to be about.  I promise I am not writing a sappy diary of self discovery.  However, that stupid 3 word questions became a barrier for me when I attempted to start committing words to page.

Should my blog be worldly and insightful?  Should it be about modern technology and marketing?  Should it delve into my passion for cooking?  Should it reflect the unique "lifestyle" of the when and where that I exist in?  What would people actually read... how could I create a persona that people would actually want to be friends with?

In this fixation to define the nature of my hypothetical blog, I began to madly research for ideas.  I looked at the top 100 blogs and saw all these wonderful personalities popping out through art, words and images.  I wanted to be one of these dynamic individuals, I wanted someone to look at my blog and think, "that is so candid, so witty, so clever!"

This led me to my Facebook page and Twitter account where I found myself scrolling back through posts and pictures trying to glimpse at my identity, hoping to be inspired and not bored by myself.

Twitter made me realize I'm a twenty-something professional who is mostly fixated on industry related articles and the NFL.  A weird mix and not particularly classy or worldly.  Facebook on the other hand,  reminded me that I have been a drunk for years now.  I thought about deleting all my old pictures, about reinventing myself.  I mean, I am a college professor and a self employed twenty-six-year-old, I should be able to come across as savvy and pertinent.

I went to delete my 800 plus photos and commit myself to a new start.  I could be a health oriented Buddhist, or a sassy marketing expert, or even an insightful social commentator!  But as I started to remove old photos of playing beer pong in a college dorm room, I felt a sudden pang of panic, like I was removing some part of myself.

Because while I may be a little of all those things, it's that eclectic mix that makes me who I am!  Suffocating some parts of me in hopes of letting other parts shine seems ludicrous suddenly.  How could I hope for a single reader to ever connect with some fake, watered down version of me?

So, I am going into this project fully intact, and that means that this blog will probably be all over the place.  But that's life right?  It isn't neatly packaged, it's a bunch of shit jumbled around and mixed up, and that's what makes it GREAT!

Thus, for better or worse, You Are Here.